Person in Fur

I'm a cat, but I want it known that I'm a person in fur.  To make sure that is known to one and all, I have taken to doing humany things.  Like the other day, there was a cup of milk on the table.  I sat up at the table, like I usually do when everyone else is sitting there, and I drank from a tipped cup just like people do.  And let me emphasize that I do sit at the table when all the PEOPLE sit there because I am a PERSON in fur.  I get fed there like most of the cats don't.  I must emphasize this, so my place isn't endangered by that obnoxious puppy I mentioned last week.  Okay, so that stupid puppy sits at the table, too, and gets fed person food.  But I get the food FIRST.  I also sit nearby when cooking happens, so I can get the person food first.  I want it known that I am a person.  People don't get rid of other people, so if I'm a people, my place here is secure.

I know I sound a little insecure, but this whole puppy business is making me feel insecure.  Every time I want to sit by my person, there's that mutt taking up my spot.  They've caught me playing with her on occasion, but I'm thinking if I befriend her, they'll make sure and keep me.  It's just not fair that I found this wonderful person first, and now I have to share her with this mutt.  Sigh.  Maybe one day soon, I'll get used to the mutt, and everything will feel okay again.  In the meantime, I'm still going to work double time so they don't mistake me for just a regular cat.

PUPPY!

Dang it.  My person has been threatening to get herself a puppy.  I wonder if she noticed that I'm a cat.  I mean, a CAT, like with fur and whiskers.  The works.  I don't know if she's noticed this but CATS DON'T LIKE DOGS.  I tolerate my person mommy's pomeranian.  He's been around here for as long as I can remember, and he's a wuss.  If he crosses me, I can tell him where to go.  The weeniehuahua is like a second mommy to me most of the time.  She snuggles me.  She watches over me.  So she sometimes gets moody and treats me as if I weren't her funny looking puppy.  For one moment, she forgets I'm her child and treats me as if I were a dreaded feline.  But as a rule, they're fine.  I can deal.

But then she delivered on her threat.  My person got herself a stinking puppy.  And this beast stinks, I mean, she smells like a DOG.  I don't care that she's sweet and constantly asking to snuggle up to one of us cats.  I don't care that she's been an angel, and when she looks at you with her blue eyes, your heart starts to melt a little.  I mean, who's ever heard of a dog with blue eyes, anyway?  So she's kind of silver-gray and brown a little like me.  Who cares?  She's a dog, and I don't want her here.  I try to ignore her, but people keep shoving her in my face.  My person insists on snuggling her ALL THE TIME.  What does it take to get service and love around here anymore?  Seriously, this place has gone to the dogs.  Literally.  It's just not right.

My Brother is Awesome

Ruru the cat here.  I have to apologize for saying Toothless, my brother, sucks a few weeks ago.  This week, he was awesome.  He caught a mouse and wanted to play with it, growl over it, and make it clear it was his and only his.  But then he shared it with me.  He let me and only me play with it.  The other cats sat around and watched every move we made.

He supervised everything I did with it, watched from inches away every time I swatted it or chased it.  He wanted to make sure I didn't leave it around like I did with one I caught, so someone stepped on it and flushed it down the toilet.  He didn't want that to happen to his prize.  But I was a good girl and had a blast chasing it around.  It just shows how much he loves me that he'll let me play with his mouse.  My brother is so awesome.  For the moment.  Maybe next week, he'll go back to being on my stink list.  But for right now, brothers are awesome.

My Favorite Channel

Hi, Ruru the Cat here again.  Last night, the most awesome thing appeared in my house: two delicious morsels under glass.  I could watch this new channel all day, every day.  I'm sure there's a way to get inside.  I could watch the little peeping, feathered tidbits all night long.  They look even more defenseless than yummy mice.  One is kind of an orangy yellow with stripes.  I picture that one on a sandwich.  The other one is gray and plumper.  I'd skip the bread for that one.

They make noise all day and all night as they sit under the heat lamp, looking like a burger at a fast food restaurant waiting just for you.  Or anybody else with a couple of bucks.  I want them so badly, I can taste them, but my people aren't being very cooperative at serving them up.  I order one on rye bread, and I get ignored.  I order one raw, and I get ignored.  What does it take to get service around here?  But in the meantime, I will enjoy my channel as often as they'll let me, and watch it with all the enthusiasm of my soul.

My Person. Mine.

This is Ruru, the most adorable, sweetest, cutest cat in the entire world.  My person has been really distracted recently, and I don't like it one bit.  She keeps going across the street to visit some "fuzzy jelly beans" as she calls them.  But I know they're other kittens.  Ones that aren't me.  I know.  I'm jealous.  But she's my person.  I don't need her cheating on me like that with other kittens.  What if she runs off and adopts one of them and then no longer wants me?  She keeps reassuring me and holding me and snuggling me and loving me.  But what if she stops?  What if she wants one of them instead of me?

Worse yet, she's started talking about a puppy.  A PUPPY!!!  In my house.  I don't know what my person is thinking.  Her world revolves around me.  ME!  Dearest person, please remember that when you run across the street to look at those jelly beans or to that store to look at the puppies, all roads lead to me.  Please don't leave me alone.