Armor

Hi, there.  Ruru the Cat here.  Remember that obnoxious puppy I'm always talking about?  Well, she's not so bad.  She plays with me and even snuggles me to sleep.  So I'll let her live.  But sometimes, she gets into these loony moods where she wants to chew on every cat she can find.  She wants to play with us because I guess that's what mentally challenged puppies [oh, I repeat myself] do.

But I don't have to sit and take it anymore.  I have more to defend me than my piddly little claws or my stupid brother, who just rolls over and takes it.  Even my teeth aren't big enough to make a dent.  No, I have a chair.  That's right friends, a chair.  A beautiful little chair that gets knocked down and goes from being a person thing to a thing just for cats.  I can hide under it, and the puppy can't get me.  But it's small enough that I can keep clawing at her from every side.  That chair goes from being a random person object to being clawing, vicious attack armor that will not take crap from a puppy.  It's beautiful.  Where has this suit of armor been all my life?

Guest Blogger: Toothless's Trauma

Ruru the Cat here.  I could fill your ear with the stuff I've been through this week.  But Toothless, my brother, insists he needs to take the blog this week.  Really?  What, so your little trauma of getting locked out and treated like a stranger is worse than what I've been through?  Fine.  Go ahead, Toothless.  Impress us.

Oh, come on, sister mine.  You've already whined about being left home while your person goes to school.  We've heard all about it.  It's my turn. And you promised.  

So check it.  I guess I'm pretty spoiled.  First thing in the morning, I charge into my person's arms and get snuggled.  All day, every day, as often as possible, I get snuggled.  I get food when I want [like everybody else, I steal it from the doggie dishes] and can beg for water whenever someone's near the sink and can start a drip for me to drink from.  I'm so well loved around here.  

Well, one day this week, I slipped out.  I was kind of confused, thinking I was just going into another room.  It smelled interesting, okay?  But then I figured out I was OUTSIDE the house.  I don't remember EVER going outside.  And it was SCARY.  There's this big, loud, black path out there with lots of big, mean monsters zooming by.  They looked ready to destroy me, leaving my little fuzzy, black body broken on the side of the road.  It was TERRIFYING.  So I started crying and crying to be let in.  But people would come out of the house, look around, and not find me.  Maybe because I was hiding, it was so scary.  I spent most of a day out there.  

Finally, my person came to rescue me.  And she thought I was a STRANGER.  Really?  You don't even know your own cat?  Okay, so I look like every other black cat out there, but we don't all SMELL the same.  What is wrong with people?  They locked me in a cage because they thought I was someone else.  Okay, so I wasn't acting like myself because I was still FREAKED OUT.  I was stuck in that cage for a whole NIGHT.  Then they stuck me in the bathroom for a few hours.  I guess they must have searched the house to make sure I was really me because they finally let me out that night, so I could dash right to where the food was and PROVE I was no stranger.  Man, what is wrong with humanity that they couldn't tell me, their beloved friend, from some other black cat?  Okay, here's Ruru back.  

Man, Toothless, you're such a whiner.  

Hey! Drama queen.   

Too late.  I got my blog back.  You see what I put up with around here?  My suffering is way worse than his.  Seriously.  

My plan

Ruru the Cat here.  I told you last week how upset I was that my person goes off EVERY DAY to this stupid place called school.  I'm pretty bitter.  Here's my clever plan to show her EXACTLY how unhappy I am with this whole idea of her going off and leaving me for HOURS and HOURS every single day.  If she tries to grab me, I run away.  If she holds me, I slip away.  It's called a protest.  I'm trying to show her exactly what a bad idea this school stuff is.  

I keep hoping this protest will work.  But she keeps going.  Every day, she goes away.  Except for a couple of days a week that is.  So far, my protest doesn't seem to be working.  She still does it.  I have to resort to letting everyone else hug me because I'm so addicted to being snuggled.  I just don't know what else to do to show my wonderful person that she can't do this to me.  I wonder what else I can do.