Armor

Hi, there.  Ruru the Cat here.  Remember that obnoxious puppy I'm always talking about?  Well, she's not so bad.  She plays with me and even snuggles me to sleep.  So I'll let her live.  But sometimes, she gets into these loony moods where she wants to chew on every cat she can find.  She wants to play with us because I guess that's what mentally challenged puppies [oh, I repeat myself] do.

But I don't have to sit and take it anymore.  I have more to defend me than my piddly little claws or my stupid brother, who just rolls over and takes it.  Even my teeth aren't big enough to make a dent.  No, I have a chair.  That's right friends, a chair.  A beautiful little chair that gets knocked down and goes from being a person thing to a thing just for cats.  I can hide under it, and the puppy can't get me.  But it's small enough that I can keep clawing at her from every side.  That chair goes from being a random person object to being clawing, vicious attack armor that will not take crap from a puppy.  It's beautiful.  Where has this suit of armor been all my life?