Angel in My House

[This is me!  I'm Angel!]

Hi!  I'm Angel!  I'm a puppy! Bean, my brother, is playing with Ru right now, so I can use her computer.  Well, Bean calls it play.  Ru calls it ...um... it's a big word that starts with an h.  But Ru says he's bugging her.  He ALWAYS bugs her.  I think it's cute.  I think everyone should love puppies because we love everyone.  I throw a party anytime ANYONE comes through the door.   I jump around and try to get picked up except sometimes, I don't want to be picked up because that would stop me from throwing my party for you.  

[A past visit]

Anyway, so a weird thing happened this last week.  This family with three little humans sometimes comes to visit.  They grab me, but it's okay.  I like to be grabbed.  Not sure I like how these little humans grab me, but they're trying and they're really sweet.  Well, once or twice or three times, I can't remember, we've come to visit them.  As long as my person is there, I feel super awesome visiting anyone.  I can celebrate and kiss people I know as much as I can love people I don't.  

[The guy with hair on his face.]

But a while ago, my people brought me down to these others with the little humans and LEFT me.  I mean, just opened the door and walked out.  They didn't even leave me my crazy brother who wants to chew on my head.  I was alone with strangers.  And worse yet, strange CATS who don't like and play with me like Sylvie does.  They hiss. It was scary.  I had a good time kissing and snuggling and celebrating these people 'cuz, you know, they're people, and people are wonderful.  I kissed and snuggled the big male human with the shaggy face.  He seemed down.  I wanted him to be happy. 

[Me and the woman and the scary cat that kind of looks like me.]

The woman was so sweet to me.  She needed to be kissed a lot.  And her face tasted great.  The kids were a little overwhelming and loud.  They kept wanting to pet me and pet me.  I kind of hit my limit, so she took me outside where there were really loud noises I didn't know how to understand..  It was okay, but I was scared because my person was gone.  Bean was not there.  Weirder still, people around me were talking about having this happen in the future and be forever.  I don't know that I can handle that idea because I'd have to leave my brother and the people I love. 

[My response to the puppies' idea of play.]

Shoo, out, dog.  Or worse yet, puppy.  This is MY blog.    Harassment.  That's the H-word you were looking for.  That is not "play" nor will it ever be.  He gets in my face and spreads doggie cooties all over me.  It's gross, worse even than human cooties.  Man, I get exhausted just thinking about throwing a "party" for anyone.  Like to be grabbed.  Who likes to be grabbed?  Especially by tiny humans.  Seriously.  Humans deserve to be tolerated, not celebrated.  Which is better than I can say for puppies.  Oooh, I actually get to rid myself of one of them?  Now, that is cause to celebrate.  Maybe if I take my nap, we'll get closer to that time.  Now to ponder how to get rid of the other puppy. 

ANOTHER Parasite?

[The furry blimp.]

Ruru the Cat here.  My people have been positively obsessed with that little female dog.  They kept feeling her belly, putting this tool on it and talking about "heartbeats," and just generally making a fuss over nothing.  Yes, Snow, I'm calling you nothing.  'Cuz you have the bad taste to be born a dog instead of a cat.  I couldn't figure out what they were on about. 

[Wormy parasite.]

And then, another of those wormy parasites showed up.  They call it a "puppy," but it sure looks like a wormy parasite to me.  Don't they know those wormy parasites get bigger and bigger and become annoying, loud dogs that invade your room, steal your dog food, get in your face, drink your water, and generally make a nuisance of themselves?  I had heard a rumor that this was going to happen, but I didn't think it actually would.  I mean, with so many dogs, why would you want another?  And with the wonderful cats in this house, why would you want another dog?  There just doesn't seem to be a point to even one dog. 

[Even the annoying Bean puppy doesn't know what to make of the little parasite.]

Too much fuss about this annoying little rat-looking thing.  Snow thinks of nothing else.  She'll go outside to go potty then zip right back to it.  Baby ANYTHINGS are overrated.  Not kidding.  Baby cats, baby dogs, baby humans...they all attack your tail, mess with your food, play with your fur, and just drive you nuts.  With a world containing me, why would you need anything else? 

Not Fair!

[Me knocking patiently.]

Ruru the Cat here.  I can't believe my person did this to me.  I just wanted some attention.  I don't understand how this could be a problem.  It was morning (for me), and I just felt a bit needy.  Okay, a LOT needy.  I yowled at the door.  I scratched it, yet my person didn't want to let me in.  

[How I wanted to be--comfy and cozy in my turf ]

Usually, my person is a lot more accomodating with my room.  So she lives there.  I choose to share it with her.  I'm nice that way.  But just because it was 11 pm then midnight then one a.m. does not mean she has the right to refuse me entrance to my turf.   She finally let me in, but then she wouldn't shower me with attention. She just wanted to go back to sleep.  Humans are here to serve us.  They should wake up whenever we want them to.  They think they rule the world and even their houses and their rooms, but this shows they don't get cats rule the world.   

[Having to compete with everyone else for space sucks.]

Oh, and it gets even worse.  She has scarcely let me back into my turf since.  I've had to compete with Sylvie and worse, the puppies, to find a place to call my own.  It's not fair.  Just because my person didn't like being awakened and awakened and awakened one night does not mean I'll do it again.  Okay, maybe I will.  But it's my house, my rules.  Why don't humans get this?

The Snake that Spits Water

[The scary spitting snake]

Hi!  I'm Bean!  Ru left her blog up, so I'm gonna tell you about this coool thing that showed up in my backyard.  It's long and gray and skinny like the boy person's snake.  But it spits out water.  It's the coolest thing.  But it's kind of scary.  But it's cool.  I want it.  But I don't want to get close to it.  

[Me vs. the snake.]

My sister is braver than me.  She goes right up and drinks the water.  But I'm afraid the water will hurt me 'cuz it comes out of a snake.  But the snake has no face.  I don't understand it.  But it's cool.  And I want it.  But it's scary.  I come close to it but not too close.  I drank some water from the spitting snake, but it just tasted normal.  It's weird.  

Ru here.  Ah, not the puppies again.  This is my blog.  Keep your snakes and water and outside and whatever to yourself.  Dogs are overrated.