Ruru the Cat here. I saw the strangest thing this week. See, we have this vacuum masquerading as a cat. Big Dude will vacuum up any cat food or any food remaining in a dish for longer than two seconds. He'll politely wait until you vacate or maybe just loom over you because he's so stinking big and then slurp up the food you really meant to save for later. I mean me. I meant to save it for later, but Dude was there to slurp it up.
Well, this week, his eye got all goopy, and he started wheezing all over the place. And he'd just sit, staring at the food. The food I meant to save for later stayed in its spot. It was weird. That alone would tell me our vacuum is busted, which doesn't hurt my feelings at all. Oh, and I guess he had a red, bulgy eye. Some of the people types even wondered if I'd beaten him up. Tempting, but it did NOT happen. Have you seen how big he is?
But the humans felt the need to rush him to that dread place called the vet's. I'm not sure what all goes on there, but whatever it is, it's BAD. Nobody likes that place. Don't know why they even have it. Well, I'll let Dude tell you about it because I don't even want to THINK about it.
Dude: Man, I felt like total crap all week. I hate not being hungry. But it totally sucked when they dragged me off in some dumb box that smelled like someone else. I was hauled into this dumb smelly place. I hated it. They poked me and stuff, and now, they tackle me and stick nasty goop in my eye that makes it sting. It sucks.
Ru: Well, that didn't tell me anything I don't already know. You're not much of a writer, are you, Dude? Anyway, it is pretty funny to watch the people tackle him and put stuff in his eye. And it's great I get to keep my food to myself. So it's not all bad.
Dude: Speak for yourself.
Ru: I always do.
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