Sunday, April 24, 2022

Butt Noodle Envy

 

[The only one I can handle on my cat tree 'cuz she's smaller than me.]

Ruru the Cat here. I've been hiding in my bedroom the last week. Too much cat drama. Didn't feel like blogging, either. It's hard to blog from an underwear drawer, too.  I mean, this is my house, right? Why am I stuck hiding all the time just because my humans aren't smart enough to get rid of some cats? The ones that aren't me? 

[The upstarts and their soft, soft tails taking over my cat tree.]

Anyway, so I was sitting on my favorite perch at the very top of my cat tree when the annoying brat Wren sat on the second-highest perch. I often remind him he's NOT welcome. This time was no different. But instead of respecting my prior claim, he just laid down, back to me and stuck his stinking butt noodle in my face, like he was trying to be as obnoxious as possible.  

[Can someone order me one of these plushy butt noodles?]

I mean, how is that all the youngest cats all ended up with such plushy butt noodles?  The humans can't seem to get enough of touching them. So I couldn't resist touching it, too. I grabbed it and licked it while he couldn't see me because I wanted to see how soft it was. And man, it was so soft and plushy.  Why couldn't I have such a plushy, soft tail? Humans wouldn't probably pet me twice as much if I had that amazing a tail. Why do the jerks get the plushy butt noodles when I get stuck with my sad, sorry, little one? Makes me grumpy.  Wren has the nerve to not only take over my house, but to challenge my right to the cat tree, and now, to have such a plushy tail. It's just not fair. I'll be over here, in my room that the adult humans think is there, working on plushing up my butt noodle. It'll make me feel better. Not as good as if I could just toss him and his plushy tail out the door. But I'll take what I can get. 

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