Sunday, September 23, 2018

Toddlergeddon Strikes Again and Again and Again and Again...

(Looks safe, doesn't it?  It ISN'T.  It's gonna grow up to be a TODDLER!!!  Dodger, run away)

Ruru the Cat here.  Remember how I joked the people with the toddler were coming back?  Well, it wasn't a joke!  They came back AGAIN.  Like, two days later.  TWICE in one WEEK!!!!  How much do they hate me?  Seriously?  I thought I was rid of them for at least, I don't know, a week or something.  Maybe a year.  Possibly a decade would be nice. 

But, NOOO.  They came back.  And they STILL have the toddlers.  The thing that surprised me was that the little pink bundle hadn't doubled in size and become another monster toddler and maybe popped out another two or three monsters just like them. 

(The terrified look of a cat watching a toddler terrorize her house.)


They seemed happily distracted most of the time with those little boxes with wheels, cars I think they're called.  They still made a lot of noise and threw around my dog food and stole my milk and generally made a mess of my lovely, peaceful house.  I just don't understand why someone would want to go and buy a crazy pet like a toddler when you could have a SANE companion like a cat.  I was relieved when they disappeared again, but then they seemed to have taken my people with them.  I don't get it.  When you have toddlers, why do you have to haul off my people, too?

Fortunately, my people came back the next day.  Without toddlers.  I'm seriously jumping every time I hear a whine or a scream or something.  I'm sure those toddling monsters will be BACK.  They're haunting my nightmares.  And since I sleep all day, I have a LOT of nightmares.  All day long, they're toddling through my dreams, grabbing me and smearing me with peanut butter.  *Shudder.*  Say it to yourself.  "Toddlers."  Doesn't it send chills?  If it doesn't, it should. 

No comments:

Post a Comment