Revenge of Toddlergeddon

Ruru the Cat here.  I was so relieved that the visitors with two toddlers were finally gone for good.  They didn't come all summer long.  Haven't been here for months.  I was starting to breathe easier, knowing they'd flown off to some other universe to plague poor, innocent cats there.

[Monster 1 rears its cat-pounding head again.]

But, no.  They returned.  [Insert scary music here.]  I think you remember what a nightmare these things are.  Well, it gets worse.

[Twix is braver than me when it comes to these monsters.]

They REPRODUCED!!!  Yes, those two monster toddlers got together and made another little, floppy, whiny thing.  In PINK this time.  I used to think the little ones were safe.  But, no, they get bigger and become MORE TODDLERS who want to chase you around and pull your tail.  Do they have some kind of machine you step into to make more little tail-grabbing, cat-slapping monsters?  I don't get how such a travesty happens.

[Look at this thing, positively mauling my poor, defenseless head.]

They came rampaging into my house a couple of days ago and positively took over, throwing around my dog food and fishie crackers, tossing wrappers and debris everywhere, running from room to room to room screaming and giggling, making stinky packages to muck up my perfectly respectable garbage cans and make my litter box cry with the stink, pounding on each other or screaming some more, and even taking over our lovely cats-only basement.  They took up every inch of my house.  Usually, I'm delighted to slip out of my person's room when things are quiet to get myself some dinner and a drink.  This time, not so much.  I seriously noped when my person's mom opened the door because I heard the toddler monsters from all the way upstairs.  And I love my tail.  It's a lovely tail.  I don't need it yanked and broken.

[Get me out of here!] 

Even my person got into the action, dragging me downstairs and putting me in toddlers' way.  I clung to my person and pretended it wasn't happening.  She laughed, I tell you, LAUGHED.  There is nothing funny about little monsters taking over your house.  They're finally gone again, but I know better than to imagine they won't come back.  And maybe next time, they'll show up with SIX or EIGHT toddlers.  Beware.  You may want to lock your doors, or the toddlers are coming for you next.