Rubber Chicken!

Ruru the Cat here.  There I was, minding my business, when someone showed up with this monstrosity.  It may LOOK like a chicken, but it sure doesn't smell or taste like one.  It's this ugly thing that smells like rubber and make really LOUD noises.  I just don't get why I need one of these things in my house.  It's not only annoying, it's something far worse: it's INEDIBLE!  Why would anyone want a chicken they can't even eat?

But as bad as this is, I have a bigger nightmare to report next week.  It's just too unspeakable to mention by name.  My people must hate me.  Really.