Weird Happenings

Ruru the Cat here.  Weird things are going on this week.  I can't quite figure them out.  For one thing, that great, big white dog showed up in our backyard.  That's way too close for a big, big dog.  She could actually touch me or sniff me or something, all of which would be totally unacceptable.  I'm in charge here, so you'd think someone would tell me.  I heard that she broke her chain and went running down the road, but this doesn't seem like a bad thing.  She could leave, and then I wouldn't have a big white dog in my backyard.  

Then there's the fact that this cat I sort of remember as my brother keeps showing up in the house.  Five cats are too many already in my space.  I don't want a sixth showing up, eating my food and growling at me.  I think I remember liking him, but now he's just so grouchy all the time.  He goes out sometimes.  Not sure why he doesn't stay there.  He shows up the most when it's raining.  He whines when he gets wet then whines about all the funky smells around here.  If you ask me, he's the funky one.  Brothers are funky by nature.  

Then there's the worst thing of all. MY room, the one in which I hang out with my person all the time, has been cleared of EVERYTHING.  There's nothing soft to snuggle on.  All the furniture and everything has been removed.  I keep hearing something about new paint and carpet, but I'm not sure what it all means.  Then, all these big wooden objects showed up.  Not sure what they are, though they're great to sit on.  Some of them even have shelves, so several of us cats can perch on them at the same time.  Now, the best part of this is the big, interesting-smelling mattressy thing leaning against the wall.  We cats love this thing.  We can scale it and climb all over it and sit where dogs can't reach us.  It's awesome.  I just wish I knew what all of this meant.  

Puppies Are a Pain

(Just the cat with her person.  The right number on one lap.)

Ruru the Cat here.  My people are nuts.  They have all these wonderful, perfect cats around but still think they need dogs.  What are they thinking?  I told you last week about this new puppy, the pomchi, Twix.  He's about my size.  How am I supposed to take him seriously?  Besides, he's just too pretty.  And not very bright.  I was hoping he was just coming for a visit.  Turns out he's my person's new shadow.  I'm my person's shadow.  She did not, does not, never WILL need a dog to worship her.  She has a CAT she's supposed to worship.  Seriously, people.  Dogs are such a waste of space.  They don't catch mice.  They don't snuggle as well as cats.  They don't use litter boxes.  They're just not CATS.

                                                    (An overpopulated lap: too many dogs)

What?  No.  Really, Dodger, I do not want to hand my blog over to a dog.  Dogs leave dog slobber, dog fur, dog cooties.  No, Dodger, Twix does not need to borrow my keyboard.  Oh, that's just rude.  You will not lick me.  Get out of my face!  Fine.  I'll let stupid Twix take my stupid keyboard.  What did I tell you?  DOGS.

                                 (Cats are scary--see Ruru's demon eyes?)

Hi.  I'm Twix.  Are you sure it's okay, Dodger?  Ruru won't hurt me if I use her keyboard?  I came from a place where I was hurt a lot.  I mean, a lot.  I had to be rescued from a hot car, where they left me for a long, long time until I almost died.  It was scary.  And my people, my master and her boyfriend, hurt me and scared me a lot.  I loved them, but it was hard.  I'm only 10 months old.  I have too many scary memories.  I don't like to be hurt.  

Another lady had to rescue me from that hot car and took really good care of me.  I hoped she would be my master, but it turns out she decided she had too many dogs in too little space and not enough time for me, so she wanted a better place to put me.  Isn't she sweet?  

(Me being happy.)

I'm happy here at my new home except when anybody but my new master tries to touch me or comes into my master's room.  All of that is scary to me because I never know if they're going to hurt me like my old masters.  Oh, and I'm scared of cats.  Kind of, anyway.  Especially Ruru, who seems to see my new master as her person and only her person.  Ruru hisses at me sometimes.  

I like to sit in peace and quiet for hours at a time and just bask in the glow of my new master.  She is so wonderful to me.  She pets me and carries me around like a baby and pets me and snuggles me and lets me snuggle her.  She's so great.  I'm getting used to the other people around here.  There's my master and my master's mom.  I like my master's mom because she pets me and feeds me and gives me water and treats and takes me for walks. There's my master's brother.  He's okay because he's small.  I've figured out small people are good.  Big people can be bad.  The one I still find scary is my master's daddy.  He's only been nice to me, but I know big people are scary.  And he's big.  I'm just sure he's going to try to eat me or something.  So I run away whenever he's near.  But I know my master will protect me 'cuz she's way awesome.  Nobody could be awesomer.  Did I tell you she's awesome?  Okay, Ruru, you can have your keyboard back.  But first, stop hissing.  Please?  

                      (This saintly cat tolerating human crap)

Hey, Ruru again.  I can definitely agree that MY person is wonderful.  Wow, that Twix is a wuss.  He seems to be scared of his own shadow.  Scared of cats?  How can you be scared of cats?  Cats are wonderful.  Cats are the center of the universe.  Especially me.  I mean it.  Just "bask" in my glow.  I dare you.

Dog Confusion

Ruru the Cat here.  So I was almost getting used to the big, obnoxious, slobbering, obnoxious, annoying, loud, bouncy, energetic--did I mention obnoxious?--dog, Izzy.  Almost used to is not the same thing as liking, mind you.  I could tolerate when she ate from my...I mean her...bowl.  I never did get used to the way she'd come into our space downstairs, steal our food, and sometimes get into our litterbox.  I sometimes let her sniff me, but I never let her play with me.  Ever.

Anyway, so I'm not sure where she went today, but she went somewhere.  And then this other THING showed up.  It's much smaller and less bouncy.  It looks and smells a lot like our resident brainless throw rug dog wannabe, Dodger.  It almost seems SCARED of me.  I can hiss or scratch at it, and instead of jumping in to try to eat my head like Izzy may have, this new thing backs up and whimpers.  I don't like how it clings to my person.  This is MY person, not its person.  But I like that I can scare it.  I like that a lot.  I wonder how the house is going to change with TWO brainless dog wannabes in the house.  And I hope Izzy takes her time in coming back.  'Cuz she's obnoxious.  Really.

"School" Is a Naughty Word

                                                           (How life is supposed to be)

Ruru the Cat here.  So when my person disappeared for a few days last week, talking about that terrible S word, "school," I hoped it was kind of a fluke or a joke or something.  I remembered that I didn't like that word for a reason.  But for weeks and weeks and weeks, my person has been holding and loving me.  She's been there for me whenever I wanted her.  Now, she leaves me for hours at a time, and I hear that awful S word a lot, both before she leaves and when she comes back.  I'm stuck looking for attention from my person's mom, and she's so busy that I don't get all the attention I crave.

I've tried and tried to imagine what "school" means.  I know one time, I had a horrible experience of getting dragged into what they called a "school."  I was stuck in a cage while everyone around me ate yummy smelling food.  Is that what school means?  That you get stuck in a trap all day and sit around, wondering what exciting things you're missing out on?  I can't imagine what's so exciting and wonderful that it's more important than sitting around and holding me.

I wish I could convince my person that doing anything but holding me is a waste of time.  She's smart.  I betcha if I tried really hard, I could do it.  Now, if only I could speak person.